Wanted: Smart, pretty redhead (natural, no dyes). Irregular hours, punishing conditions. She must be prepared to take a bare bottom spanking at any time day or night.
I'm having a bit of trouble with my on-going spanko novel. It's that I can't get the pictures right in my head and that's slowing up the writing process.
The problem is that my picture wall doesn't include my central character, Beryl. A while ago a vanilla writer friend recommended that I stick pictures on the wall next to my work station of people and places to help the imagination to fire on all cylinders (it does help, although I don't have my 'picture wall'on a wall - some are not the sort of pictures you want your granny to see).
The problem at the moment is that for the new novel I've got something for all the characters, except Beryl. She's definitely a redhead, with that sort of pale complexion that offers a perfect canvas for spanking marks, but I can't visualise her other features in detail.
So, today I've been googling for redheads. Some of the information is less than useful. According to Global Spin the world's pre-eminent gingers are Rebekah Brooks and Prince Harry. Both could probably do with a good smacked bottom, but neither is what I'm looking for.
Then I discovered a site that helpfully lists world-class reds. Interesting stuff. I didn't know that the lovely Julianne Moore had written children's books about growing up as a redhead.
Julianne is a marvel, but she's not Beryl. Nor is the elegant Marcia Cross - Bree from 'Desperate Housewives' - who does look to me as though she'd make a Olympic gold medal spanker (when the sport gets its rightful recognition).
Christina Hendricks has lots of what I'm looking for. But she's not the real McCoy, just a blonde with a good hairdresser. The best bet seems to be Karen Gillan, but I loathe the whole Dr Who thing so she's tainted by that connection.
So, I'm stuck. Any ideas?